In Search Of Black-On-Black Love : Code Switch : NPR
Every long-term or significant relationship faces many issues. Some tend to be right on the surface and others are deeply buried and seldom. Why should men and women try to please one another? For love's sake. When these issues arise, they're ready to have the "relationship talk." Psychologist. But having a strong relationship without trust issues helps us give have different perspectives; some may support Black Lives Matter, and others don't. has been married to a Ukranian-born Jewish man for seven years.
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Honestly, we get bored sometimes. Some women even say men have a low attention span. I think this is very true for our attraction level. Attraction levels can go down over time, but it's a two-way street. After a lot of the mystery is gone, so goes some of the attraction. It's not that we don't care -- because we do -- it's just that we need variety.
Try to mix it up and keep it sexy and mysterious sometimes. Seriously though, initially there is a lot of excitement and newness about being with someone, but then usually it morphs into something boring and regular.
Oh, it's Friday night -- must be date night.
Sex is a crucial part of a relationship. It needs to be spontaneous, exciting, regular and fun. If that means telling us what you like or doing things we like, then by all means, go for it! We feel like we can't always say what we want to say without starting a fight.
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A lot of us give up and don't try. Other times, after too many fights occur, we just start agreeing to avoid a fight. Learning how to communicate well with our partner is always a huge issue because we can sometimes seem to be on a different wavelength.
We have a hard time being completely honest about things sometimes, and this goes for our feelings and our life goals.
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Are you bored with hearing your partner complain endlessly about work without doing anything about it and therefore tuning out? Once you can get a handle on why one or the other partner no longer listens, you can dig deeper into the issues.
Communication is key here and needs to be addressed before any greater issue can be solved. Remember that your relationship is a compromise between two very different people and when you got together you made that commitment together. Be vocal about your frustrations and be open to hearing about what your man might find irritating about you too!
Unreasonable expectations Unreasonable expectations are exactly that, unreasonable. Many men and women have crazy expectations about the institution of marriage and what that entails. Resentment can build up if a partner feels particularly shocked with reality.
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These expectations and unexpected realities double for child raising, when lack of sleep, stress and financial pressure bring out conflicts in nearly every couple in the world.
The list of areas where people have unrealistic expectations are nearly endless: If something seems extremely unreasonable to one of you, it probably is, at least for your specific relationship. Seek advice and help from either friends or family who have gone through something similar, or an objective 3rd party such as a therapist or counselor. The other person usually winds up feeling deprived, resentful, and unimportant.
Furthermore, the more self-involved you are, the more you take your relationship for granted, the less you appreciate your partner, and the more alone you actually are.
So if your relationship is this way, you also lose out, because you experience less of the joy that a true connection brings. You and your partner both get more from the relationship through reciprocity in giving and receiving. Relationships are about give and take. You should want your partner to be as happy and content as you are. Or do you just get down to the complaint at hand?
Relationships are the same. Bringing up issues and problems in the past may be helpful in establishing a relationship history initially, but by constantly bringing up the past you will lose sight of your future.
To complain over and over about past events only dilutes the current issue, leaving the other person worn out, overwhelmed and likely to tune out about your current complaint. Trust issues The foundation for every solid relationship is based on trust.
Honesty is the best policy applies more than ever in intimate relationships. Sadly, many of us grew up in homes where trust between parents was fractured and this childhood history can lead any of us down a similar relationship path.